Beowulf: the first record of foreign aid?

Laura's sparksnotes version of Beowulf:

-Beowulf lands in the Danish territory where a terrible monster has been terrorizing the Scyldings in the king's mead hall for 12 years.
-Beowulf and his loyal band of followers are welcomed by the king and sleep that night in the mead-hall waiting for the ugly beast.
-He arrives. His name is Grendel. After fierce hand-to-hand combat, Beowulf tears off his arm, and the monster limps back to the fens where he dies.
-They celebrate, Beowulf gets lots of precious gifts and the king's accolades.
-But their celebration comes too soon. Grendel's mother then terrorizes the hall, killing one of the king's best comrades. Beowulf follows her to the ocean where sea monsters writhe and the dead man's head is found. Beowulf dives into the ocean with his armor and kills the evil sea witch with a sword. He brings back Grendel's head.
-The King honours him with unbelievable riches, and he returns home (and it continues).

Beowulf is what the UN aspires to be, but what it fails at. The UN will never be as effective a foreign aid agency as Beowulf: it doesn't have a loyal band of followers, and it certainly does not have a fearless leader. Furthermore, few people in it are willing to literally or figuratively sacrifice their "lifdaegs" to slaughter the hideous hag and her terrible son who terrorize the land. "Honour" is an obsolete word, and no one cares about gold hoards these days (although I beg to differ)

What Beowulf and present aid/development agencies have in common is this:
-They both seek out adventure and praise from tackling problems of foreign lands.
-They have come to settle old debts and gain the trust and praise of the inhabitants.
- They believe their biggest resources are bravery, strength, and good-faith.

I say, some progress is better than none. The UN should not aspire to be like Beowulf; and besides, Beowulf probably never existed.

While a catchy new slogan for the UN might be, "UN - ripping the arms off giants descended from Cain," it would be hard to take literally. Especially since the UN's approach to Grendel would be interviewing hundreds of witnesses, bringing in scientists and other specialists, spending at least a year displacing the community to another land, filing hundreds of reports, hiring short-term project managers, discussing and persuading China to get on board, looking at gruesome photos and reports, going to the mead-hall and talking some more about it, looking at the fen-lands where the monster lives and taking measurements, throwing sand over their shoulders for good luck, ringing bells, writing lots of rune-stones as warnings, shooting off their mouths again, and finally, when everyone in that region is either gone or dead, building a memorial.

Beowulf would be drastically different if it has been called UN-wulf. Instead of talking about what makes a good king (protecting the people), we would talk about what makes a good President or dictator. A good President would richly reward aid agencies that help his/her citizens. A good President would offer plenty of mail-coats and beer and gold rings. The President as ring-giver would offer treasure for truly brave warriors.

I'll fax this to the UN right away.